Going into this movie, I hadn’t seen a single DC film since Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice. So it’s safe to say, my hype for this movie was through the roof.
While the modern superhero movie seems to consist of Hollywood churning out the same cookie cutter bullshit (with the occasional few brilliant films making appearances along the way), this movie was neither. The ‘funniest film of the year’ title doesn’t come from the supposed comedic moments, but from how laughably bad it is.
Aquaman is a disgrace
It would appear that literally nobody knew what they were doing. Every single member of the crew clearly needs to go back to school.
The worst thing about Aquaman is that it’s a product of Hollywood. To the general viewer, Hollywood is the top tier of film. So the fact this film is beyond riddled with problems in every single aspect is ridiculous.
There’s being lazy and firing out the same movie over and over again just to make money and then there’s this. If anyone were to come out of Aquaman a fan, they’re probably the same people who would pay extra money to see it in 4DX – bringing their swimming costumes with them.
Going back to the Hollywood aspect of things, Aquaman obviously had a pretty large budget (around $200 million), yet any CGI in the movie looks like it came from the opening credits of Jim Henson’s Labyrinth. And the practical effects, sets and costumes look like the original Power Rangers series with a bigger budget. I applaud any feature (especially one from Hollywood) that goes with practical over CGI, but at least make it look good.
It’s not just the special effects that make the film look bad, but the cinematography too. Near the beginning of the film, a dolly zoom is misused and from there on in, you just know that the Director of Photography (DOP) didn’t have a clue what they were doing.
The lousy camera work and effects blend together to create a hideous looking film, the peak of which comes once the story finds itself in Sicily – this section of the film placed on the island looks look a Müller Yoghurt TV commercial.
Admittedly, it’s not all bad. There’s one scene in which the cinematography is marvellous, but it simply isn’t enough. It just makes the audience yearn for more.
There are other sections of the film that improve in parts, such as some of the comedy. And there are even a handful of scenes which are particularly good, but it’s really patchy.
If the movie fails, blame me
James Wan stated “if the movie fails, blame me” and while it’s doing incredible at the box office, it’s certainly a failure in my in my eyes.
Considering Wan’s talent and name, it’s surprising that so much of the film went wrong. Even the actors, all of whom have proven they can all give good performances, appear stale and lacking in any chemistry. It feels like everyone involved was only in it for the payday.
The script had some good ideas in there, such as ocean pollution being the reasoning for Orm’s lust for war, but these good parts aren’t expanded on all too well, leaving the audience feeling flat.
Overall, Aquaman is an absolute mess. A mixture of terrible scriptwriting, editing, acting, and more, all thrown together and assisted by one of the worst and most inconsistent scores/soundtracks ever (Pitbull’s cover of Africa by Toto… oh god!) creates one of the worst films of the year.
A terrible movie that I would only recommend to those looking for a good laugh.
Rating: 1/5 flicks.
Audience rating: two guys in the back would not stop laughing throughout the entire movie… oops, that was my buddy and me.